Monday 4 April 2016

A review of my life - the concise version


It is often said that people's attention spans are getting shorter, particularly when reading online. With this in mind - plus the fact that I can't be arsed to string a full sentence together - today's ramblings will comprise single-word descriptors (OK pedants, a few phrases and compound words as well) of each decade of my life; a sort of concise, pocket-sized version of my time on planet earth.  

0 – 10 years: hazy, poo, magical, summery,  Procol Harum, giddy, peeping, kaleidoscope, chips, ice-cream, Santa, tooth fairy, kiss-chase, Dion, climbing-rope tingles, doctors-&-nurses & tonsils.                                                        

11 – 20 years: wanking, rejection, heartbreak, fear, fury, idealism, wanking, Chi-Lites, exploring, experimenting,groping, fingering, wanking, Eagles, dribbling, escaping, wanking, Barley Wine, preening, angst,  puking, posing, pissing & wanking.

21 – 30 years:  shagging, intoxication, studying, shagging, bingeing, all-night parties, achievement, qualifications, love, commitment, Leonard Cohen, shagging, poverty, worrying  & shagging.     

31 – 40 years: weddings, breeding, striving, promotion,  progression,  frenetic,  sleepless,  fathering, exhaustion, caring, doting, vasectomy & cask ales. 

41 – 50  yearsmirror-gazing, plucking, introspection, Merlot, fillet steak, trimming, blogging, lettuce, regretting,  reflecting & mid-life wobbles.. 

51 – 60 years: retiring, writing, publication, walking, Viagra,  haemorrhoids, greyness, drooping, sagging,  loss, funerals,  closeness, intimacy, shrivel, Port, aching, holidaying, cruising, spending kids inheritance & contentment. 

What would your life look like in single words or phrases?



Photo courtesy of Vlado at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

21 comments:

  1. S U P E R B.

    Mine would look a lot like this, except the wanking & Viagra!!! ( 10 years old? ) really?

    ------Love how I can continually get my (SMILE) on when clicking into your virtual universe!!

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    1. Your support appreciated - as always. Not sure where the 10-years-old came from - are you reading it off a mobile phone?

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  2. My one would say 'Previously messed up but on the mend'. I wonder what your next years would look like since you seemed to have done it all so far!
    Enjoy the week mate, RPD

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    1. Thank you, RPD. I, too, like to believe I'm wiser now, and more content.

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  3. YOU HAD CLIMBING ROPE TINGLES? Mine were monkey bar tingles. I had no earthly clue what was happening, but I stayed in the playground all the time.

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    1. Monkey bars never did much for me. But the climbing rope - I clung to it like a limpet!

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  4. Actually, you've pretty much summed up my life. We don't call it wanking, though. And I still...oh, I've said too much already.

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    1. LOL - so what is the American word for it, Al?

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    2. Spanking, whacking, beating the bishop, tugging, polishing the missile, beating off, shaking hands with your buddy, jacking off, tossing off, choking the chicken...I could go on.

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    3. No, I think that's enough. I'm losing my sight by just reading your list!

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  5. I have to give this some thought. It's an interesting challenge.

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    1. I look forward to the CC version. Take care.

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  6. Hmm, I could probably say it this way: 0-16 Moving every 2-3 years (dad in Army). 16-18 - huh? (high school years). 18-40 What a mess. 41-Now I met Alpha Hubby and wow (plus lots of s*x which I noted on your end lessened and lessened?) - plus LOVE "spending kids inheritance & contentment." Yeah. What you said!

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    1. Yes, LBD, the sex reduced in frequency, but improved in quality (at least I like to think so - Mrs Jones might give a different version!)

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  7. Climbing rope tingles? Cool! I had monkey bar tingles. I had no idea what was happening, but I never left the playground.

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  8. I got my usual laugh! and now I'm thinking. Doing this exercise can be better than an hour on the psychiatrist's couch. :) I'll try it if I ever feel the need for therapy and save the $ that the shrink would get.

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    1. There you go - Bryan Jones' Diary can save you money! Thanks for dropping by.

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  9. This was strangely beautiful. Reading. Understanding. Reacting. Thinking. Commenting. End.

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    1. Thank you, Daniel, for your concise response. I think I'll try going a whole day using only one-word utterances.

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  10. 0-10 playing (6 brothers & sisters); 10-20 learning (not much); 20-30 boys (until I met The One); 30-40 working (too hard); 40-50 consolidating (built our own house etc); 60+ (not at 70 for quite a few more years) playing (again).

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  11. Your segments seem healthy and normal. And great to hear that you're now in a 'playing' phase (I can identify with that). Thanks for reading and commenting.

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