Maybe there was a time when I had more ambitious aims in the bedroom. Nowadays, I try to impress my lover in a different way. My good lady wife, my partner of 31 years, typically retires to bed earlier than I do so by the time I enter the bedroom she is sitting up in bed reading her Hello magazine. I stand facing her at the foot of the bed. Slowly, nay tantalisingly, I begin to undress, removing one item of clothing at a time and letting each drop to the floor. My good lady doesn’t look up, pretending to absorb the glossy-page splendour of Kate Middleton and Prince William. When clad only in my grey, partially perished, George underpants, I pause (a deliberate ploy to ratchet up the tension). Teasingly, I slide my briefs down to my knees and let them drop, but before they hit the floor I stick out my cultured left foot and lampoon them under the elastic waistband. Standing on one leg, with my boxers swinging from my outstretched foot, I bend forwards with my eyes closed and hands behind my back (have you got the picture?) and proceed to flip the undies high into the air. Rotating like a boomerang over my bowed head, without moving my hands from the base of my spine, I catch them just above the nick of my clenched arse.
What a lucky, lucky lady my wife is!
Oh MY! Does she burst out laughing? My husband of 24 years does similar things to which we both collapse in heaps of laughter, it's the laughter that turns her on :)ReplyDelete
Thanks for hooking up to the Hump Day Hook Up
Your husband and I are examples of men still working for their ladies' smiles. And I think you're right - if couples can laugh together, and at themselves, the relationship will endure. Thanks for taking the time to comment.ReplyDelete
Cirque du Soleil has NOTHING on you!!ReplyDelete
Oh yes it is a strikingly artistic sequence, combining elegance with creativity!Delete
That is QUITE the visual. Wow.ReplyDelete
Yes, I think I deserve maximum marks for artistic impression.Delete
To show you just HOW VERY out of shape I am, I cannot even mentally picture what you're talking about. Two words: Video blog.ReplyDelete
I just love any man who blogs about private parts and bedroom games!
No, Joy, I couldn't risk being sued by observers claiming compensation for the psychological damage caused!Delete
I would pay good money to see this.ReplyDelete
Oh it would be worth every cent!Delete
hahaha so funny. I love a man who's willing to be ridiculous to get a laugh. No wonder she's been with you 31 years. :)ReplyDelete
Beth - being ridiculous is one of my few strong points!Delete